I’m home! And I was worried that I was going to feel weird in my Brooklyn apartment since I haven’t really had all that much time to make it feel like home but I don’t. I feel normal in it. So: hooray!
On the plane I watched a couple episodes of House. I never really got into that show, perhaps because I can’t get past my disbelief that anyone’s last name is really HOUSE, but it was pretty entertaining. Now I’m going to go not unpack.
I have to submit a bio for this page about NY’s Funniest Reporter. Should I turn in a standard or ridiculous one? Incidentally, I think those should be condom and/or light bulb sizes.
On my way back to OC after doing Red Eye. The LA bureau is a whole different vibe than New York. It's almost like a local branch of a bank, except the pens aren't on chains and actually this bank metaphor is a terrible one. But it's very relaxed and kind of sleepy and bungalowesque as opposed to nyc which is big and imposing and bustling and frenetic. That was kind of redundant, huh?
Anyway in the midst of doing the show I read an email from a fan that kind of rattled me which I'm embarrassed to admit since I think I'm supposed to be above all that or something. Anyway. I need to learn better email management.
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So I'm at the hospital where my mom had surgery this morning. She's okay, just had a pesky gallbladder removed and a couple hernias repaired. I almost got in a fight with two evil women in the parking lot and I'm too tired to go into the details but I almost had to bust a psychotic dance move in their ass, which I so totally would have. I mean really, isn't a hospital parking lot a weird place to be a total bitch? I'm talking about them, not me. I was meek and docile but inside I was, um, not that way. Also, on the plane out I watched Growing Up Marsupial. Have you seen this? So cute! As for this hospital, it's good but it's no Seattle Grace. That's probably good actually.
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Me: I look like a freak.
Sarina (exercise class teacher): No, you look (long pause) fascinating.
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I forgot to mention that yesterday was Tobey's birthday!
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Not to be a cliche New Yorker but I am getting really sick of waiting in lines. The talent needs an over-the-door towel rack from Bed Bath and Beyond, damnit.
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Me: Is there a problem?
Eric: Yeah, the problem is we used you too much and we should probably use someone else.
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Today I had a four hour break in the middle of the day which is considerably more annoying now that I'm living in Brooklyn and can't go home to fuck around. Well, I mean I can, but it just didn't seem like the best use of time. I was going to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond to buy an over the door towel rack and some garbage cans but instead I went to the movies and then bought a pair of shoes. I plan to hang my towel on the movie stub and throw my trash in my shoes. The left will be for mixed cardboard and the right for orange peels and coffee grounds. Basically I'm going to compost in my right shoe. You're welcome, planet Earth.
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Marc Kushner and Mattias Hollwich are the architects who designed the rooftop where I'm doing these segments until the thirteenth and I love both of them equally even though typically I don't like architects with the exception of Elise Keaton from Family Ties but I love Marc Kushner a little more because he told me where to catch a cab in Brooklyn so now I don't have to give all my money to a car service. Instead I can give it all to yellow cab! Hooray!
But really, I should get back on the train. And I plan to. But carrying all this crap isn't conducive to commuting by train not to mention the fact that the rooftop is nowhere near the train. Know what it's near? Time Out New York which I used to just walk to because walking forty or so blocks seemed easier than taking the train. That was before I lived in Brooklyn though. Anyway I'm worried about the integrity of my hair today what with Hugo. Hannah? Horatio? What's the name of this hurricane? Also I keep triping on my own pants while walking down the stairs and I'm afraid I'm going to take an embarrassing spill. Also, this cab driver is talking too loudly on the phone.
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