I feel dizzy.
You could do worse than seeing A Camp and Craig Wedren tonight, especially if you’re familiar with the way former Shudder to Think frontman Wedren has gone on to do the scores of a number of TV and movie things often involving The State and Stella guys. Speaking of doing worse, Rush is playing tonight, and while I’m in no way beating up on the Canucks, I personally can’t go because of what happened last time I saw them. Trip down memory lane with me? I call shotgun. (more…)
Not to brag or anything, but I just got off the phone with my new buddyroo, Josh Schwartz, and we were talking about music, and I decided to pay him the compliment of talking at length about myself and all my various feelings about things pertaining to me, and afterward I was reflecting while checking myself out in a mirror and thinking that, as I was explaining to ol’ J.S., music used to be such a big part of my life—I mean, I used to play in a band for crissakes—and it just isn’t anymore. (Although I do really like the new Rilo Kiley album but I forgot to tell him that.) And part of loving music was loving going to shows. (more…)
You like to laugh. I know because I’d recognize that braying titter anywhere. I mean, I like it, don’t get me wrong. It’s just very recognizable. Especially when I have a headache. But don’t go changing because it’s what makes you you. Even if sometimes it’s what makes you annoying. You know? But like, in a good way. Anyway, take your lusty guffaw to a Comedy Central Presents taping, won’t you? You have to register on their site and then hope and pray for an opening. If it doesn’t happen you can bring your wet-sounding chortle to the Ritalin Reading Series at 7:30pm.
I’ve been posting quite a bit on the TONYblog. Maybe you want to read my posts over there? I think you do! Here’s today’s 1 Thing. It mentions movies and my inspirational prowess and then here’s a 1 Thing from Wednesday which mentions Brooklyn and Michael Showalter. And then here’s a delightful little post where I busted my coworker for his breakfast trysts. But wait there’s also this one! And surely you love this conversation about mumblecore. And some stuff about Fringe. And a very important You Gonna Eat That with Drew Toal.
Also, unrelated except not to me because everything relates to this: I saw a mouse in my apartment last night. If you were anywhere near me a year ago you know how I named the mice last time around with the hopes that I could convince myself that Chad, Rob and Grover were cute uninvited cohabitants instead of horrible frightening vermin. It didn’t work. Then a professional exterminator “rodent proofed” our apartment which solved the problem and was the best couple hundred and seventy five I could have spent. Well now a year later those whiskered assholes have chewed their way back in apparently. Or one has. He was hanging out near the foot of my bed seemingly surveying a box of beads which was down there too since the mini-move has put the wrong things in the wrong places. I just hope there’s only one of him. Regardless the exterminator is coming out tomorrow morning. I’ll be sitting up all night holding a jar of peanut butter, a wedge of cheese and a giant box. Probably a couple magazines, some triscuits, a paddle-ball, a Chinese finger catcher, a Chinese jump rope, some fortune cookies, a Magic 8-ball, an actual eight-ball, two cans of hairspray and a squeegee too.
Iambic pentameter? I’m not into Satan, thank you very much.
Alfresco is really the best way to enjoy Shakespeare, with the possible exception of al dente or, if you’re feeling funky, in a class called something like “From [Name of Tragedy] to [Name of Tragedy]: The Tragedies of William Shakespeare.” I took such a class in college which, despite my dewy face and general youthful demeanor, was some time ago, and so I can say that the plays really hold up. I mean, I read them when they were current. We’d pack up a saddlebag of tomatoes to throw at the players (more…)
When I interviewed Fiona Apple in late 2005, I thought that if I were somehow a different kind of interviewer, or maybe a different kind of girl, I would have known how to share lipgloss and become best friends with her. It felt, in the setting we were in—a rehearsal studio in Burbank, techs and musicians and guys all around; we were the only women there and we’re roughly the same age—that that’s what should have happened. I don’t know that I can explain it exactly, but if we’d been on a double date we should have gone to the bathroom together, (more…)
Culture jam
Greetings, my little string beans. I had a particularly disgusting weekend as I was the victim of a pernicious new wave of street crime. Little shits on bikes spit loogies at me! I suffered a ride-by phlegming! Allow me to recount for you: So there I was, walking unawares down Avenue B. It was around 9:40pm. I heard the sound of bikes to my left and I also heard the sound of phlegm collection which is that dry-to-wet kind of throat clearing, coughing up sound which is not unlike when your hard drive is doing something loud and you realize there’s something wrong with your computer. I greeted this sound with slight trepidation and a bit of nausea, as I have a real visceral reaction to street loogies glistening on the sidewalk like so much throat snot. Actually, it’s not just visceral, it’s intellectual too, (more…)
Yesterday I told you that tonight your 1 Thing was going to be a wine festival and I’d be a no-good liar if I changed my mind, now wouldn’t I? But then again in yesterday’s post I told you I was a horrendous liar, so I’d be a liar if I kept my word. I’m like a logic puzzle! If I had a twin who was standing in front of a door and behind one of us was the door to freedom and behind the other, Bob Barker, which would you choose, provided you were allowed to ask only one question but knowing that I only wear pants on days starting with T and my twin only wears pants on days starting with S and she has six hatboxes and only four hats, one of which has to be returned to Marta by 3pm on Sunday?
If you enjoyed that, you’re a masochist.
Wait, no, what I meant to say is that if you like games you’ll love our Games issue (available online tomorrow). I tried to do some of the puzzles last night before getting frustrated by the cryptic crossword, which is the caviar of crosswords I’ve been told, which is why I recommend putting it in the fridge for about four hours and then eating it with a dab of sour cream.
Because you never miss an opportunity to get three sheets to the wind, which incidentally is a sailing term, sailor, I was going to recommend you take your enlarged liver and ruddy, bulbous nose to a wine festival, but then I realized that actually that wine festival is tomorrow, which leaves you with precious little to do tonight. Fear not, my prize melons! Tonight you’ll be tapping, high-kicking, macarena-ing, hustling, sprinklering, cutting the deck, and shuffling, cabbage patching and more at Midsummer Night Swing at 6:30 at Lincoln Center. Now, I should warn you that I’m a horrendous liar—an horrendous liar to be exact—and so really you’ll just be swinging and salsaing and doing that thing where you stand in place and bop around like you did to Def Leppard in seventh grade. But if you were to unleash a little Roger Rabbiting, I can’t imagine it would be greeted with anything but amazement, because your moves are magnetic, which is why I’d appreciate it if you’d stay away from my hard drive.