The book on the left is one I found at the house where I’m house and dogsitting this week. The one on the right is a gift from Dustin. A funny side note: Last night I tweeted a photo of the fart book with the caption, “A belated Christmas gift from Dustin!” but the photo had Charlie the dog in it and most people assumed I was saying a dog was the gift from Dustin. They also assumed it was a yellow lab and possibly it was Molly (Adam Carolla’s dog) which makes no sense as it’s Charlie, a white pug/shitzu/Japense chin/I’m not sure/mutt rescue/small dog and to which I ask, what would the fart book be doing in the foreground of the photo if that were the case?

Also, I have a lot of other news and thoughts and things which I should probably blog so as to get them out of my head to leave more room for some philosophy ideas from the book on the left and some names of farts from the book on the right. A quick update which has nothing to do with the preceding sentence, I recorded some stuff for E! over the summer which I thought was only airing internationally (like all the porn I’ve done)(I haven’t done any porn) but people have been telling me they’ve seen me on E! to which I usually think, “Thanks but I think you’re thinking of the BIO channel,” but then I checked and the shows are airing. I think one of them, Movie Stars: Then and Now is on tomorrow at ten. I haven’t seen it yet and I may have been terrible.

Also, the fart book has sound effects!

Also, fuck daylight savings.

Pre-winning

I’ve been watching the Charlie Sheen circus this week and even reporting on it, almost nightly, on The Adam Carolla Show. By all accounts Sheen seems crazy as fuck right now but in the back of my mind I began to wonder if this might be an act, or if not an act, a performance… or an exaggeration. There’s something methodical and deliberate about Sheen’s rants and what’s missing, to my way of thinking, is the news that after this or that interview he was caught wandering the streets or yelling into a tin foil ball or ripping his clothes off and pronouncing himself Jesus. For the most part he seems to be showing up on time, talking about winning, tiger blood and Goddesses, and then going on his way, keeping his nose clean, no pun. The  nutjobs I’ve known have been a little messier with their mania.

On Saturday Sheen tweeted that he’d be appearing on Ustream that evening on Brad Wyman’s WYTV network. I know Brad and his producing partner Barry Schuler (former CEO/Chairman of AOL and very early fan of my Ustream show for which I’m forever thankful) and I hosted a live stream of the premiere party they held for their series LOOK.

I emailed Barry, initially just out of curiosity (“Do you really have Sheen on Ustream tonight? WTF is up with him???”) and proceeded to interview both Barry and Brad, separately, in what I’m told is the first interview they’ve granted a reporter about their involvement with Sheen.

I broke /shared some of the story on The Adam Carolla Show tonight. Here are some of the things Wyman and Schuler told me:

They say Sheen isn’t crazy: “He’s an entertainer. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

I asked what the endgame is. They said in the beginning Sheen’s goal was to get his show back but it’s turned into something bigger. They helped introduce Sheen to twitter and encouraged him to take control of his “brand.”

Wyman, who’s known Sheen since they were teenagers says he said to Sheen, “I’m not in the business of exploiting Charlie Sheen.” Sheen’s response? “I am.”

Wyman said he received a 3 million dollar offer to develop a Tiger Blood product and this is just one of the many offers rolling in.

I asked Wyman about the twitter exchange he’d had with Chad Lowe, who encouraged Wyman to get Sheen help. Wyman said Lowe is a “worry wart” but admitted he’d also probably be worried if he’d only seen Sheen in interviews and not been in close contact with him for the last many months. He says anyone close to Sheen who’s concerned should just pick up the phone and call Sheen and see for themselves that he’s fine.

Sheen intends to continue doing Ustream shows but will likely dispense with the talk show format of the first outing. (Bad news for Simon Rex and his fart sounds.)

More details on the episode of The Adam Carolla Show that’ll be up on iTunes tomorrow. For the record, both Dr. Bruce, who was on the show tonight and Adam are still of mind that Sheen’s lost his.

Holt McCallany and Adam Carolla

This was one of the cooler things I witnessed on the show, even if, as you can see from the photo, I was arcing away from the action so as to not catch a stray punch to the head. I’m somewhat accident prone but I see it more as accidents seeking me out as opposed to the other way around.

In other news, I feel I didn’t give a thorough enough breakdown of the Westboro first amendment decision on Thursday’s show. I agree with the Supreme Court ruling even if it’s odious. The whole point of the first amendment is to protect unpopular or endangered speech. It’s great that we’ve come so far that hate-filled bullshit like that of Westboro is now unpopular but it wasn’t too long ago that civil rights protests were unpopular. It would be nice to only protect the speech you agree with, but whose sensibilities would we be putting above all the others?

On the show I said the decision had to do with public versus private space, which it does in that the protesters have to be on public land and have to keep a specific distance from the funerals but moreover it has to do with public versus private interest. Unfortunately it was determined that Westboro’s vitriol involves matters of public interest: the role of the US government and military and its actions abroad, homosexuality in the military, religion, which is the kind of speech protected by the first amendment.

Below is the first amendment. The funny thing is realizing from day one it was put in place to make sure irritating nutjobs will forever be allowed to yammer on about religion:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Side note: I could probably do with a little less hair twisting on camera.

Hanging out with Fred Armisen, being that person

Here I am with my new best friend, Fred Armisen. I meet all sorts of neat people now that I’m doing the show but I don’t usually take photos with them because I don’t want to be that person but on this night I decided to be. I should probably be that person more often, you know? (Note: That person meaning the person who takes photos with people, not the person who hangs out with people, which I so totally always am.) (Another note: I never am.)

And then here we are recording the podcast live at the Jon Lovitz comedy club. In the first photo I am keeping a respectful distance from Dr. Drew. In the second I’m keeping a respectful distance from Jeff Ross. The minute we got offstage I was all over them though. (Note: the minute we got offstage I actually went to the bathroom and then hung out with my parents)

So how was Dr. Drew you are likely wanting to know? He was really nice. Here’s what I think: Most performers you meet are probably more comfortable on stage or in front of a crowd than in social situations. Dr. Drew meanwhile seemed completely at ease just shaking hands with people and relating, probably because he is a doctor first, then a performer, whereas I am a performer first and then an astronaut. You know?

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