…I have the time to open up my heart to something that can both give and receive love. Meet Fred:
Fred, getting ready to drop a one-linerHe’s brand new but already I can tell we’re going to get along great. Plus, he tells the funniest jokes!
Now that I'm going freelance
Fred, getting ready to drop a one-liner
You mean I’ve been replaced by a house plant already? There is just no way that Fred could tell a better frog joke than Ted. Well, maybe he could but…
I would like to hear some of these jokes from Fred. If he’s funny enough he could probably make an appearance on Red Eye.
Quote of the day:
” I knew I saw that somewhere …”
—–Jack “I demand you to stop making any Fred Jokes and Give me my fricking stolen plant back cause I’m dying of Glaucoma (Not Guacamole) right now” Hoff, Idaho
You just met Fred over the weekend and you’re living together already? Separate bedrooms, I hope.
So what do we know about this young man… err… plant? Does he have roots in New York?
I hope he treats you well, Alison. If not, I’m stopping by with my pruning shears. My BIG pruning shears!
Fred says: “I’m so hot, I can photosynthesize myself!”
I was trying to check out your CDs next to Fred. I see The Royal Tenenbaums soundtrack. Track 19 might be good background music for leaving your job (for ruminating and yearning—two of my favorite pastimes). Have a hanky ready.
Looking forward to your RedEye w/Greg Gutfeld™ appearance!
Have a good week. 😉
Chris M.
Andy Levy is probably going to say something about this on the “Post Game Wrap Up”. I expect him to say “Alison, Who’s Fred?” or something like that.