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Puppies, wisdom teeth, Dustin, socks, hoarding, babies

I’m the kind of person who can feel attachment to just about anything, as evidenced by the way I name my plants and can’t bring myself to buy a fish because I know it would crush me to find Fred or Skippy (the name of my fish) belly up and to feel I had failed him. The irony, and now I’m not sure if that’s the correct usage of irony or the casual incorrect usage which eventually will become the correct usage since words are losing their distinct meanings and pretty soon we’ll all walk around “bemused” with “notorious” iPads that “literally” say “MLGHRF” on them and what was I saying? Oh yeah, the odd or unexpected thing here is that I can’t bring myself to buy a fish and yet I dream of having a puppy. You might be thinking, “Don’t you mean a dog? You know that puppies don’t stay puppies forever, right?” however I really just mean a puppy. I definitely don’t have time to deal with anything that’s losing cuteness and gaining size by the day. In fact, I fully intend to make any puppy I purchase sign a contract stating that either party may terminate the arrangement at any time.

I was thinking about attachment though because vronsfan2005 got his wisdom teeth out and tweeted about it and I got mine out some years ago and I was remembering that a few days before the procedure I was sitting in my chair at Time Out New York thinking, “These teeth will never be in this office again.”

I can also recall having trouble throwing away a sock many years ago, and Dustin (who is not my boyfriend! I realize that my blithe references to him may scare off potential suitors and I’m in  no position to scare off any potential suitors since my biological clock is ticking hard and I really want to get married and have babies immediately, in fact that’s what I tell guys I go on dates with when I explain that Dustin is not my boyfriend). Where was I? I really need to quit going on these long parenthetical tangents and then thinking I can get myself back on track. I’m a writer, so if anyone can I can, and yet it’s as if I’m driving a car and while trying to get back home I lose interest in retracing my steps and instead decide to just pull over and build a new different home. So my point was that Dustin is not my boyfriend, we’re just friends, but once  he busted me about my socks.

Anyway, I think maybe I’m a proto-hoarder. I have hoarding tendencies. Of course, I think probably everyone does which is why that show is so popular.

Oh and RSVP to my Ustream show on Wednesday, won’t you? It may or may not feature Jim Norton. It will definitely feature me talking about this whole online dating thing.

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18 Responses to Puppies, wisdom teeth, Dustin, socks, hoarding, babies

  1. vronsfan2005 March 8, 2010 at 11:32 am #

    Ha! I think its pretty funny you would blog about your/my wisdom teeth. I got a nice high from the gas. But i’m good now and I can talk, and i’m talking alot. I like which tweet you decided to use to, awesome chizz. Sending love, warm regards and a swollen palate,

    Vronsfan2005

  2. Alison Rosen March 8, 2010 at 11:36 am #

    So I take it you were awake during your procedure too?

  3. Tastyvocals March 8, 2010 at 11:39 am #

    Get a Shiba Inu! Cute puppies (you already know that) and they don’t get huge when they grow up. Ours is 7 and I still don’t think he knows his name, just “puppy.”

    Word.

  4. Alison Rosen March 8, 2010 at 11:43 am #

    What’s his real name? I think I know but I forget…….

  5. Jaqob Jackson March 8, 2010 at 12:18 pm #

    Looking forward to Wednesday’s show. I’m there 🙂

  6. vronsfan2005 March 8, 2010 at 1:28 pm #

    yeah I was awake, not for lack of trying. I tried to sleep but the thought of some weird guy in an orifice didn’t let me.

  7. Tastyvocals March 8, 2010 at 1:28 pm #

    His name is Tomo. It’s Japanese for “companion” or sumthin like that.

  8. Outlander March 8, 2010 at 1:31 pm #

    I had to be knocked out because all of my wisdoms were impacted. Did I miss anything good?

  9. vronsfan2005 March 8, 2010 at 3:03 pm #

    I had two taken out, 1 is impacted. that’ll come out at another time. I have 3 wisdom teeth and my friend has 5. So he stole one of them when I was asleep.

  10. Andrew Cardona March 8, 2010 at 7:32 pm #

    Ha! I think its pretty funny you would blog about your/my wisdom teeth. I got a nice high from the gas. But i'm good now and I can talk, and i'm talking alot. I like which tweet you decided to use to, awesome chizz. Sending love, warm regards and a swollen palate,

    Vronsfan2005

  11. alisonrosen March 8, 2010 at 7:36 pm #

    So I take it you were awake during your procedure too?

  12. Tastyvocals March 8, 2010 at 7:39 pm #

    Get a Shiba Inu! Cute puppies (you already know that) and they don't get huge when they grow up. Ours is 7 and I still don't think he knows his name, just “puppy.”

    Word.

  13. alisonrosen March 8, 2010 at 7:43 pm #

    What's his real name? I think I know but I forget…….

  14. Jaqob Jackson March 8, 2010 at 8:18 pm #

    Looking forward to Wednesday's show. I'm there 🙂

  15. vronsfan2005 March 8, 2010 at 9:28 pm #

    yeah I was awake, not for lack of trying. I tried to sleep but the thought of some weird guy in an orifice didn't let me.

  16. Tastyvocals March 8, 2010 at 9:28 pm #

    His name is Tomo. It's Japanese for “companion” or sumthin like that.

  17. Outlander March 8, 2010 at 9:31 pm #

    I had to be knocked out because all of my wisdoms were impacted. Did I miss anything good?

  18. vronsfan2005 March 8, 2010 at 11:03 pm #

    I had two taken out, 1 is impacted. that'll come out at another time. I have 3 wisdom teeth and my friend has 5. So he stole one of them when I was asleep.

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