Readers, hello! New York is cold as nuts and it’s not the weather I’m talking about, it’s the way I haven’t written anything on this blog today which has left you feeling out-of-sorts and dare I say, bereft. I do, I do dare say it. I dared it and said it and now I have to move on. Too much wallowing.
I should go to sleep which I planned to do 37 minutes ago but it took me 37 minutes to figure out what New York is as cold as. Nuts? It doesn’t even make sense unless you keep your nuts in the freezer.
I don’t though. I put them under my pillow so I can have crunchy dreams. I also shove shellfish, soy and traces of chocolate under there as a precautionary measure in case anyone with food allergies tries to attack me in my sleep.
No problem Alison – I was just happy to have electricity this morning. It's so DARK when the lights don't work!
Here's something fun for a chilly fall day. I recently found an article & slideshow about the world's sexiest bars. It's interesting to look at. They have a description and picture of each bar, and also a pickup line.
Here's the link to the slideshow: tinyurl.com/4sejh7
If you're in a hurry, here's the Cliffs Notes version of the bars and the pickup lines:
Le Ti St. Barth, St. Barths: "I'm supposed to stop by Jay Z and Beyoncé's yacht for a quick glass of Champagne—wanna join me?"
Denis Simachëv, Moscow: "I get a discount at the Prada boutique."
Bellini Bar, Antibes, France: "Mind if I talk to you for a moment? I'm hiding from Harvey Weinstein."
Nublu, New York City: "Let me buy you a drink—it's important to stay hydrated."
Buzz Beach Bar, Ölüdeniz, Turkey: "So, Istanbul, not Constantinople? Let's grab a booth and discuss it."
Moon Bar, Bangkok, Thailand: "I don't know what's hotter, you or this 96 percent humidity."
Nuth Lounge, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil: "Now I know why they say Brazil's two main exports are oil and beauty."
Dino's Beach Bar, Tofo, Mozambique: "I just got back from a week in the bush. Want to see some of my tribal dance moves?"
Giardino d'Inverno, Milan, Italy: "Is it true that most people are too intimidated to approach drop-dead gorgeous models?"
Shalvata, Tel Aviv: "Holy Land or not, it'd be a sin to let you go."
Hmmmm…. I wonder which of those would work on Alison.
We now all know peanut butter is the WMD of allergic foods. I think there’s even a UN sub committee whose charter is to limit the development and weaponization of this toxic substance.
Back in my day (7th grade), if you forgot your lunch you could go the office and they’d give you a cold peanut butter sandwich to eat. Besides being a horribly dry meal, we now learn it was a potentially deadly one as well.