I just spent all this time importing clips only to go to play them and discover the audio was missing because I’d put the RCA cables in the output, not the input, because hey man, who am I to say there’s one right way to plug things? Also because I’m an idiot. Anyway, now I’m going to have to redo all those clips because I need my mellifluous tones, you know?
Also, we’re closing in on crucial puppy naming time.
Also, I’m being interviewed for a Biography Channel bio on Bob Saget on Wednesday.
Also, there’s a company party tomorrow night involving party-oke. Party-o-ke? Party-no-ke!
Also, Greg told me he hates when people add “tastic” to words. (“Oh God, you just did that thing I hate” is what he said.) This was after I said “scat-tastic” though, which I still think was the only applicable term.
Along the same lines, I think I’ve insulted a number of people with my publicly abhorring actionable. Seems quite a few people use that word.
Also, I overhead a guy on the street tell another one he’d been “rocking some serious, serious nausea” this week. I wanted to tell him I’d been “sportin’ some gnarly crabs” just to see what he’d say.
Is it possible to to be mack-tastic while partyokeing to melancholy and the infinite sadness (that is what I am picturing being listened to), naming a puppy, being actionable in referencing Bob Saget, all the while sportin some gnarly crabs? butter your toast.
Next time you have trouble finding which hole to plug it in, try this tech support:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fWpV_6Y_vY
I don’t want to be the dog name spoilertastic but if Oreo doesn’t work out then here are a couple more: Lucky, Elmo, Boogie or Muffin.
Does the winning blog-dog name contestant get a prize? Maybe you could give us a free subscription to the Biography channel!
Quote of the day:
“Is that Caveman show still on..”
-Jack HOFF, ID
Hahaha.. all Red Eye fans should post messages on The Daily Gut and send e-mails to the redeye mailbox with words ending in “tastic.” After all the outrageous things Greg has said on the show, it’s such an odd thing for him to hate.
BTW, the video of Red Eye clips you posted yesterday was great. “Federal issue.. federal issue.. totally federal.” Laugh-tastic!
Alison’s Blog, It’s like Silence of the Lambs, but with less facials. (Think about it.)
Alison: If beauty and sophistication were a crop field, I’d spread my seed over every inch of her.
Greg Gutfeld: if charm and wit were an automobile radiator, I’d twist his petcock until all his fluid was drained. Yes, that’s an actual process.
Alison: If sexiness and a great smile was a remote control, I would randomly push her buttons throughout the night until I fell asleep.
Michael.
La.
Should people actually be afraid of Big Brother? The answer to that is no. All the people living in the Montana mountains or other various hiding places are hiding for the wrong reasons. The government is not who we should be afraid of. It’s people that are in marketing. These people go to school to be educated on how to control and manipulate people. It’s not the media who is manipulating us,it’s the endless commercials that we watch. They are there to persuade us into buying products. They have various ways. For example, They use colors,sex,catchy jingles, just to name a few. So in closing, marketing professionals are the one’s controlling our every choice and movements. Those are the real fanatics. And that’s my six pack abs feeling!
Michael.
La.
I was viewing your Time Out New York clip and kinda did my own body language thingie of you. My sound card isn’t working so I watched it with no sound. I observed that at the first part of the segment, you like to talk with your hands. Then towards the end, you held your hands together and they were still. I thought to myself that perhaps you became aware of it, and you chose to stop. Very intriquing. As far as your facial expressions, you looked very poised and confident in whatever you were saying. Keep in mind, no sound for me. You also were leaning forward toward the other person, which to me said that you were very in tune and respectful to your counterpart. You also had a very relaxed demeanor. So nothing but good things is what I saw. On somewhat of a different note. I notice that you like wearing clothes that are somewhat conservative. You show your neckline very frequently, but without cleavage. To me that says that you are maintaining your professionalism, but perhaps there’s some other deeper meaning that I can’t quite put my finger on. But that is the great part of it. Keep the mystery alive. This concludes Michael’s body language segment.
Michael.
La.
OMG! Michael, You crap me up! See if you can find the hidden message in this comment (I’m not as clever). To add to this body language segment, every time she does the wink with the thumbs up sign, I interpret her as conveying F-You to the other person. That nose twitch thingy is still up for interpretation.
Wow, Yahoo got it right for once!
Today’s top Yahoo Searches:
1. Ted B. Goodlove
2. Alison M. Rosen
3. Diet Dr. Pepper Berries & Cream
4. Shira Lazar
5. Bob Sagat Fan Clubs
6. Kevin Bacon (What the hell?)
7. Red Eye
8. Missouri
9. My B-Day is on 12/25 (for real)
10. Body Language Experts
I can only hope that you meant crack instead of crap. I find that very disturbing. Oh yeah, I forgot to say that while I was in Mississippi, on the way back there was a hugh sign that said: Home of Gerald Mcraney. You know, the guy that was in Simon and Simon and Jericho. I just thought it was neat. It was in Hattiesburg,MS. if I’m not mistaken. I never would have guessed I was in a town that bore such royalty!
Michael.
La.
Here’s another gem you might enjoy.
Alison: If sexiness and beautiful lips were a towel, I’d rub her all over my body after a shower, then put her away wet. Isn’t that romantic and seductive all at the same time? That’s just the kind of guy I am.
Michael.
La.
Do you have certain friends in your life that you could label “Yes men?” You know, the kind that agree with everything you say, even though deep down what you are saying is by no means right. It’s not that they are so agreeable, it’s just that they don’t want to get emotionally invested in whatever your idea or thought is at the time. If in their mind they actually do disagree with you, they’re not gonna say it because like I said, that would entail going into a meaningful conversation. Who wants that? Well, me. I like to surround myself with people who tell me that truth, even if it hurts. That’s the only way you can grow as a person. Not only do I talk the talk, but I walk the walk. I have recently severed ties with a group of friends that I would label as “toxic”. I didn’t have to wait for Jan. 1st. I don’t need a date to decide that I need to make a change in my life. And that’s my six pack abs feeling!
Michael.
La.
Crack…Crap…Craptastic…what’s a couple of letters between bloggers!
[Note to self – Proof Read the damn crack, I mean crap that you write]
Michael’s comments: it’s like the mind of Mencia, only my name isn’t Mencia. Anyway, I wanted to tell another stupid meaningless comment about my stay in Miss. I stopped in several places to get a drink. (soft drink), and all I could get was a bloomin’ Mr. Pibb. I had no idea that it was still being made. I remember growing up there was Mr. Pibb, but didn’t think it still existed. I still enjoyed it, but it was just strange to me. How come I can’t get a Mr. Pibb where I live? Why is it indigenous to Miss? Well, I’m sure the answer is just a Google away, but I’m too lazy.
Michael.
La.
P.s. Ted, I promise if it were just a matter of a couple of letters I would have let it ride. I’m sure you can understand that. *smile*.
I know I’m gonna look like the internet police, but I just have to point this out cause I’m laughing out loud on this one. I was rereading the introduction to this segment, and on the last paragraph you said that you “over-head a guy.” I’m only pointing it out because it was funny as hell, and arousing at the same time. Alison, you can overhead me anytime. As long as you still respect me in the morning…Ha!!
Michael.
La.
One more stupid comment, then I shall retire for the evening. I would like to know who coined the phrase, “There’s more than one way to skin a cat.” If you think about it, how can that be? The only differece is you may start from a different end. Or perhaps use a different sort of cutting device. The end result is you are removing skin from a cat. So I challenge anyone to prove this stupid cliche’. Besides who in the hell goes around skinning cats? This perplexes me.
Michael.
La.