Archive for the ‘if I drew cartoons’ Category
If I drew cartoons for the New Yorker
I’d draw one of a guy in the middle of a labyrinth or maze and the caption would be “I’m getting a little tired of staring at these same 37 walls.”
New New Yorker cartoon idea
If I drew cartoons for the New Yorker I’d do one of a guy on a horse near a cactus and maybe some antlers or sagebrush or a skull and he’d be wearing a sombrero and a poncho and he’d have a look of total confusion on his face, like he didn’t know how he got there or who he was. The caption would be “Mr. Smith has a señor moment.”
If I drew cartoons for the New Yorker
So you know how there are those cartoons in the New Yorker which are droll and whimsical and you read them and chuckle and then there are ones that are certainly whimsical but you don’t really get them and there seems not even to be a punch line and you wonder if maybe they aren’t cartoons at all but some kind of illustration that goes with the story? Except the story is about the evolution of the home washing machine and the picture is a man looking at his watch and saying out of the corner of his mouth, to another man “Well, I guess that about answers it.”
Anyway, the following cartoon is somewhere in the middle of the two.
A guy dressed as a pirate would be saying to another guy. “Yeah, I wrote all about it on Grogspot.com.”
Wow, the amount of self-loathing I feel right now is hard to put into words. When puns go bad…
If I drew cartoons
So I just now, just a few moments ago thought of ANOTHER idea for a New Yorker cartoon. I swear people, sometimes my mind is so fertile it’s scary. It’s like I have manure between my ears!
If I drew cartoons for The New Yorker I would draw one of a bunch of construction men loudly hammering a sign (or somehow installing a sign but clearly whatever they’re doing is making a gigantic racket) and the sign would say “Quiet Please.”
Once again Shamrock has given me the gift of me
Last night on Red Eye Andy asked if I’d come up with any more New Yorker cartoons in my mind and I mentioned this one. The awesome Shamrock made this and posted it on The Activity Pit. Now, I should say that despite the way I titled this post he didn’t actually give ME the gift of me. He gave all of YOU the gift of me and for that you are thankful. (for the explanation of this one… because good cartoons need explanation of course… watch the video below or read the “if I drew cartoons” thread.
About that New Yorker cover
Not to state the painfully obvious, but if they’d just gone with “Blue Cheese,” they would have avoided all this controversy.
more cartoons
Tuesday night on Red Eye, Andy asked me if I’d drawn any more New Yorker cartoons in my head, which I so had, and I mentioned the one where a hunk of cheese is telling an obscene joke and the caption is “Blue Cheese.” Well Activity Pit member “Shamrock Republic” has once again made manifest my thoughts, which is awesome. You see, when it comes to all things doodley, I am merely an idea person. I leave the heavy lifting to the Irish.
Also, today I had a delightful lunch with someone who doesn’t think Lisa should win Next Food Network Star because he thinks she’s crazy. I nodded as if I, too, think she’s a wackadoo and yet, deep down, I don’t. I’m sorry, Lisa, I sold you down the river and the sad thing is that I don’t even know why. You deserved better, especially after Jenn broke the apricot sauce jar and got glass in your duck confit.
Behold this awesomeness
As some of you may know, I’ve been blogging about the New Yorker cartoons I’d draw if I drew cartoons for the New Yorker and I even mentioned one of them on Red Eye. Someone named ShamrockRepublic made the following and posted it on The Activity Pit. Yay for me and my beauteous thoughts! (Thanks Shamrock!)
affiliate.