Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend

Sneezes that sound like primetime

Written by Alison | March 12th, 2009 at 12:00 am | Comments

Does something bloom at about 10pm in NYC because this is the second night in a row my allergies are acting up at night. And by 10pm I guess I mean what feels like 9pm. In fact when I sneeze it’s really a nine o’clock type sneeze. It sounds like the theme song to Grey’s Anatomy, not Perfect Practice, if you know what I’m saying which I doubt you do. It also sounds like Frasier which I’m pretty sure was on at 9pm at some point. Maybe?

So why am I writing about my 9pm-but-it-was-really-10pm sneezes at three-in-the-morning- which-is-really-two-in-the-morning? Because my friend Scott who is a super duper computer guru helped me with some stuff and took control of my screen and said “Are you sick?” (we were ichatting with audio which I didn’t realize was a viable option because I’m still living in the past of one hour ago) and I explained that no, I’m just experiencing the kind of allergies one has when cats spontaneously bloom at 10pm. Cats and dust apparently. And those dander bushes, too. But the computer stuff took awhile. And then I wasted time doing I’m not even sure what.

So I’m tired is what I’m saying. And stuffed up.

| Posted in Uncategorized

  • Joe

    Alison, it's amazing how whatever you post on your blog is instantly reflected in the ads that show up.


    Your post about sneezing and allergies made these ads appear:



    -----------------------------



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    Help for Allergy Symptoms

    Take action against animal allergy symptoms. Learn more here.



    Dog Shampoo Dry Skin

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    ----------------------------------



    I think you should do a post about menstrual cramps and see what kinds of ads pop up! We could make this into some kind of online game.

  • Ted from Accounting

    Dude, my allergies were so fucked up (sorry Meringue) for like 4 months, I thought I was going to explode!


    Sorry your stuffed up Ro Ro!

  • EDinATL

    Re: JimK


    HELL YEAH WOOOOOHOOOOO FUCK YOU NORTH TAKE THAT YOU SON OF A BITCH!

  • Prototype 3: Rise of the Machi

    Civil War + pollen???


    Nothing like blaming Robert E. Lee for Alison's allergies...

  • Prototype 3: Rise of the Machi

    Private Practice?


    [Facebook thumbs up "I Like" option] to your allergies.



    I love it when cats explode around your premises.



    Just ventilate your apartment by opening up a window or two (regardless of how cold you might think it is). Always does the job.

  • EDinATL

    I was going to make a comment about your cat blooming each night at 10pm, but here's what I decided to say instead.


    Alison, the whole problem you're having with daylight saving time is that you are beholden to your circadian rhythm. I ditched that bitch a long time ago, ya heard? I'm not taking orders from no society or sunlight. BTW happy 3-11 day!

  • JimK

    It's The South. I capitalize it like that on purpose, because for allergy sufferers, The South is one large monolithic entity that has been producing pollen for weeks now and the warmer winds are bringing it up north BECAUSE THEY WANT TO KILL US OVER THE CIVIL WAR. IT'S A GIANT REVENGE SCHEME, DECADES IN THE MAKING and clearly I need to drink some beer and get a frigging grip.


    Seriously though, my allergist told me just this morning, southern pollen is coming up north and making things miserable for people allergic to tree pollen. My guess is you get a healthy dose all day long and your body reacts late at night to all the evil southern pollen BECAUSE IT'S FRIGGIN EVIL SENTIENT SOUTHER POLLEN AND THE PLOT GOES DEEPER THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE///////



    Holy crap I need a beer.

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