Comments on: Confessions of a Shoporexic

By: Brett Jones

Brett Jones — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 21:50:00 +0000

I decided months ago that if I were to find a magic lamp, one of my wishes would be an edit function for blogger comments. The second, is to pass by AMR on the street so I could make a scene, and the third is whirled peas, because I care.

Also, I use the bearings in my manhood. They provide a pleasing texture and do in fact reinforce it.

By: Toddrod

Toddrod — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 21:31:00 +0000

Brett, I’m still trying to figure out why you put little ball bearings in your tail, and how that reinforces your manhood! Hey, man, I’m not being judgmental, cuz everyone has those crazy things that turn us on. Have you considered looking into anal beads? (I have a feeling that Alison won’t post this comment now)

Toddrod

By: Brett Jones

Brett Jones — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 16:53:00 +0000

On the topic of strong perfumes used to mask other more horrible smells.

I'm a guy who drives a truck, not some wimpy little import truck, but a genuine GMC 1/2 ton crew cab 4x4 truck. I'm also a Volunteer Fire Fighter. I know, I know. I is possible for me to be any manlier? Without the benefit of some penile enhancement pills or lengthening surgery, I don't think so.

NOTE: The previous paragraph has little bearing on my tail, mostly I just wanted to reinforce my manhood.

Anyway I was traveling to the gas station with a couple of gas cans in the back of my truck, when they fell over and spilled some gas onto the bag my turnout gear was in. This was a problem for two reasons. The first being that it's generally frowned upon to enter a burning building with gear that's soaked in gasoline. Something about bursting into flames. The second reason I forget.

So I dropped the gear off at the laundry mat on my way home. When I picked up the gear I noticed a very strong and un-fireman like pretty potpourri smell wafting up from my gear. It seems they washed it two times but it still smelled of fuel, so the third time they washed it with the chemical equivalent of dead flowers and fruit.

The smell is so powerful that in one day it's filled my shop (another manly place filled with manly tools and equipment) with the condensed smells of an English garden.

I'm now praying for a nice house or apartment fire so I can return my gear to it's proper smell of charred wood and burn chemicals.

My god this is a long reply.

By: Joe

Joe — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 14:04:00 +0000

That's one of your funniest posts ever, Miss R.

I like when you talk about your "chromosomal makeup" because I always assumed you used Elizabeth Arden.

And I really love how you recycled the duckling picture, because in my book there's nothing better than a green blogger!

By: warren the turd

warren the turd — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 10:15:00 +0000

If you were running for office..I would put my ballot in your box.
that is all.

By: Ted from Accounting

Ted from Accounting — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 08:54:00 +0000

A very intellectual approach to Miss Rosen's mental state Todd! I just think she's wacky! Kinda like Howard Hughes before he went senile…the long hair & finger nails stage!

By: Trapp

Trapp — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 08:29:00 +0000

Perhaps. Comedy and tragedy are two sides of the same coin, as they say. It's certainly not unusual for artists to go through these highs and lows. Of course, that can be further complicated by simultaneously not wanting to do anything about it. Valentines Day coming up wouldn't help.

By the way, she's right about those commercials being made by space aliens. The pajama ones are downright bizarre. They have a surreal quality to them, and the way they run two of them back to back like that, definitely makes it like Valentines Day in the Twilight Zone.

I believe the best thing that we can do for Alison, is several days of psychoanalysis, followed by a slew of mushy valentine blogs on Valentines Day.

I still think that impalement is the best way, but I'm game if everyone else is.

By: Rod Legojevich

Rod Legojevich — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 07:39:00 +0000

As a supporter of your blog I have to angrily say Why the effing sh%t is your STARMETER at 47% in IMDB.COm ? It’s a travesty i tell you !

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2853396/

By: Toddrod

Toddrod — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 07:25:00 +0000

Sometimes, when Alison writes a blog such as this, I feel like she’s bearing her soul to a degree. She’s saying something significant, and sometimes there is a sense of sadness mixed with the humor. The humor is a camouflage pattern to the textile of melancholy underneath. I sometimes have these feelings of loneliness when I shop. As a single man who’s never been married. I remember a time when going to the mall meant only buying some shoes, and making googly eyes at the pretty girls. However, now, I find that I dread trips to the mall or most other stores. I do feel that sense of loneliness as I stride the teen filled walkways. I have little to nothing in common with most people here. It’s what it must be like to be a foreigner in a land where nobody speaks my language. I can feel the isolation.

Toddrod

By: Jordan Myers

Jordan Myers — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 06:40:00 +0000

Awww man I like that movie it is actually pretty good.

But anyways, people like you are good they stimulate are economy. More so than the stimulus bill will ever do.

Bring the ducky on red eye!!!!! And give it to Bill as a gift that would be awesome.