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I'm December!


I’m December in the (un)Official 2009 Red Eye calendar! Hooray for me! And thanks to Joe for putting this together even if I’m now going to have to hibernate for 11 months or so.

Did I mention my sister made Tobey calendars? Yes, I think I did.

Also, last night I was choosing between two shirts. One which showed off the not-all-that-ample cleavage and a turtleneck. The turtleneck was more comfortable but the other one was more “hey, look at me!” I decided to just wear the hey look at me shirt but then found out we were going to be watching a band outside for much of the evening so I should dress as warmly as possible. “Oh goody” I said with as much sarcasm dripping from my voice as possible. I considered explaining that this plan sounded about as much fun as sitting on my hand for three hours till I lost all feeling and then slapping myself in the face with it but instead I just decided to change sweaters. In the course of doing so I wrenched in some way that made it so my neck and shoulders are totally stiff and now I’m that person who has to turn my whole upper body to look to the left or the right. “I wish I was seeing you guys on a night when I was more limber,” I announced through gritted teeth. Other things I said: “I’m so cold and stiff I can’t hear,” (it makes no sense and yet it was happening) and also, “Sorry I’m so cranky and whiny.” I wasn’t really sorry though. Due the limited mobility I wasn’t able to be as smarmy as I wished when someone I haven’t seen in forever told me he’d seen me on an Adam Sandler special. I couldn’t even nod arrogantly. I love nodding arrogantly!

Also, I was introduced to a guy who patted down and then blew on my coat sleeves. The explanation? “He’s really drunk.” It was strange though because it was almost like he was demonstrating some kind of tailoring prowess. I don’t care if he’s a lush, if I need something hemmed I’m tracking him down.

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0 Responses to I'm December!

  1. Prototype December 27, 2008 at 9:23 pm #

    I’m surprised that you are satisfied with just one month…No full year of Alison Rosen?

  2. Joe December 28, 2008 at 6:01 am #

    Prototype, a full 12 month Alison calendar would be awesome!

    I almost wish I could hibernate for 3 months and wake up after the worst of the winter is over, although it’s actually supposed to get up to about 50F where I am today.

    At 50F, people in Miami are walking around in coats and gloves, but here (in Vermont) I wouldn’t be surprised to see some folks wearing shorts, tee shirts and flip-flops today.

    My rule of thumb is to wear a light jacket below 50F, a heavy coat below 32F and to bring along a hat and gloves below 0F (in case I get stuck in a ditch somewhere).

    At 15F below zero I actually wear the hat and gloves.

  3. Ted from Accounting December 28, 2008 at 11:05 am #

    Dude, that calendar was AWESOME! Freakin Joe…your stock is rising buddy…and that is tough in the current market we’re in!

    I think you picked the perfect people for the calendar! Maybe I could create a WIJI board with these faces on it!!?!?!?!

    Happy Sunday you blog geeks! Muuuuwhaaap!

    Joe, did you ever find out the answer to that question?

  4. Anonymous December 29, 2008 at 12:06 am #

    Remainder of the year comment:

    sneezing on clothing, brings back child hood memories….

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