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It's like

I don’t even know what color my parachute is anymore!

But anyway I’ve been peering around all three walls of my new cubicle (or, if you’re pressed for time you can refer to it as my newbicle) and thinking that it’s totally bare. I even have lots of drawers which are also bare except in one I have a tape recorder, in case I need to blackmail people, and in another I have a matching tank top and sweater set, in case I need to go to a debutante function. Okay fine, the tape recorder is for interviews and the change of clothes is in case I get called for a sudden TV thing and I’m wearing a hoodie or something. So but the newbicle is very free of personal detail, save for the coffee smell I accidentally imparted to the papers sitting on the desk when I spilled some vanilla flavored coffee yesterday. The whole thing got me thinking about things I won’t be decorating the area with, hence:

Things I Won’t Be Decorating My Cubicle With:

1. Guns or any sort of gun rack
2. Gum or any sort of gum rack
3. A clock which counts down the hours until the next Burning Man
4. A Grandfather clock
5. My Grandfather (R.I.P.)
6. Sports team pennants
7. The box I think outside of
8. Okay so it’s a tampon box
9. Kettle drums

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0 Responses to It's like

  1. Ted from Accounting February 6, 2008 at 10:16 pm #

    I think your parachute is cream colored because the cream always rises to the top!

    This seems like the best place to post this so here goes:

    Wendy Molyneux’s “Everything is wrong with you!”

    Ok, so this is a bit different kind of Post Game Wrap for me because I‘m covering a book today. A few weeks ago, Alison recommended Wendy’s book “Everything is wrong with you!” I have to say that Wendy’s book is really good! FYI – This blog averages 1,138 views per week. That is 59,176 views per year. So it is important that my post game wraps are accurate.

    So I’m telling you that “Everything is wrong with you” is just a fun book to read from cover to cover.

    If you’ve read some of the writings of Norman Cousins and the healing power of laughter then you know that only 10 minutes of laughter a day can enhance respiration, stimulate blood circulation, produce morphine like molecules called endorphins and reduce stress. Trust me that Wendy’s book delivers some euphoric endorphins and much more…just a fun time!

    I’ve enjoyed Wendy keeping me up the last few nights and I think you will too! 

    Great book Wendy Molyneux!

  2. Anonymous February 7, 2008 at 7:32 am #

    Well, since you have a list of what you’re not gonna decorate your newbicle with, I think it’s only fair I give a suggestion, in which if you’d stop being so impatient, I’ll tell you. I think I just gave the mother of all run-on sentences. Settle down, I’m getting to it. I think you should find Fred’s cousin Gully and decorate your newbicle with him/her. You know? Fern Gully? Oh whatever! you know that’s funny.

    Æ.

  3. Joe February 7, 2008 at 7:37 am #

    But maybe you SHOULD put up a gun rack… as a warning to others to tread lightly…

    “Decorating” cubicles used to be a specialty of mine. I once went into work really early to decorate the cubicle of one of the women who reported to me. It was her birthday, so there was a Happy Birthday sign, but I also put up a lot of others that said things like “Giraffes This Way”, “Please Don’t Feed the Baboons”, and “Lion Exhibit Closed”. I also put up some leaves and vines. It looked like a zoo.

    It was kinda funny, but she really didn’t “get it” until later in the afternoon when a guy in a gorilla suit showed and gave her a dozen birthday balloons.

    I once decotrated someone’s cubicle to look like a bathroom (the woman loved bathroom humor). One guy who had been away for a while came back to find his cube covered with large “spider webs.”

    The best was probably when I (and a few friends) reconstructed Boston’s Bunker Hill Bridge in a guy’s cube (actually OVER it). He had gotten lost on the bridge while in Boston on business. We couldn’t help but rub it in just a little.

  4. Ted from Accounting February 7, 2008 at 11:14 am #

    I sense some cubicle stress building…

    Try this game:

    http://www.eyegas.com/cubiclefreakout/

    Make sure you click on the guy at least twice.

  5. Joe February 7, 2008 at 1:11 pm #

    Ted – that’s GREAT!

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